This past week as I was teaching my adult English as a second language class, I happened on to a lesson dealing with pessimistic speech. That is using words that cause us to project doubt, disspair and negative thinking when we speak. After teaching that lesson, I began to realize that the words that come from our mouths are actually programmed into our being based on the attitude that we have towards others and to life in general. We all know people that no matter what happens it could be better or it could benefit them more. Those type people project the "victim" mentality that life is "happening" to them and they are not being treated fairly. Nothing ever seems to go their way and they are good people so "why is everyone or everything always picking on them?" These type people have conditioned themselves over time and through events to focus on words like : I can't; If; doubt, I don't think; I don't have the time; Maybe; I'm afraid of; I don't believe; I; It's impossible; and They will never. I have also learned that most of the time, these type people are never happy and to some extent seem to enjoy keeping issues stirred up and creating chaos. They get stuck in life believing that life is all about "me". I learned a few years back, however, that life is not about me!
| I learned a few years back, however, that life is not about "me"! |
However, in the world in which we live, life is to short and others around us need us to much for us to have this type of attitude and to allow this attitude to affect who we are and who we become. We have to figure out a way to breakout of this type of thinking and move to a more positive and optimistic approach to life. Zig Ziglar calls this negative thinking, "Stinking Thinking" and tells us that this type of thinking will end up ruining our health, our relationships and everything that we come in contact with in our lives. It is like a cancer that has to be stopped if we are going to be the best we can be in our lives for those we care about and for those who depend on us. So, in order for this to happen, we have to eliminate the words that I mentioned earlier in this article and instead focus on using words like: I can; I will; Expect the best; I know; I will make the time; Positively; I am confident; I believe; You; All things are possible; I am willing to change, are you?. These types of words automatically cause us to be more optimistic and positive in what we say and can lead us to live a more positive life. Have I peaked your interest in examining yourself and to determine whether or not you are an optimist or a pessimist? If so, below are a few steps (not easy ones) that you might consider and try in order to help you with your attitude and your outloook on life.
1. Evaluate your present attitude - Positve or Negative?
2. Write a Statement of Purpose - Why are you here and what do you wish to accomplish?
3. Develop Action steps - What do I have to do each day to attain my purpose in a specified timeframe?, then do it.
4. Eliminate negative words that cause negative thinking - You may need to keep a list of negative things you say and try to avoid them.
5. Have the desire to change - Do you really want to improve your life and the lives of those around you? If so, you may need to change.
6. Develop good habits - What bad habits do you have? Replace the habit with a good habit and try it for 30 days straight, because habits (even attitude which is a habit of thought) are aquired over time, they are not instinct.
7. Choose to have a positive attitude - Do you want to have a positve attitude? If so, don't rely on an external force to give it to you - just choose it!
If you would like to know more about Attitude and how to improve it, check out the book: Attitude 101 by Dr. John C. Maxwell. This book talks about many of the things I have mentioned today and goes in to even more detail on how we can make a positive difference in our life and in the lives of those around us.
Good luck and Be Optimistic!